Inspiration for Domination

You, and everyone like you, are my inspiration for domination. I want to make it clear to you that I don’t consider you a peer or even an equal, I consider you beneath me. I thought with our history together you might have figured that out, but you still astound me with your stupidity and lack of awareness.

Football is not mysterious. I think it might be the least mysterious sport I have ever participated in. If you study enough, it becomes easier and easier the more you play it. You should look at every game you play as a learning experience, even the shitty pick up games on the beach. You get out what YOU put in. No one can do the work for you.

But YOU seem to think that if you sit back and wait for long enough, someone who actually knows how to play the game will do the work for you. Since I have known you, you have not improved as a player at all. In fact, with all of the ‘work’ you put in it seems like all you’ve learned is how to cut pathetic games into mediocre highlight reels.

Before I dig the knife further, I want to take a moment to say that I am a staunch advocate for women’s rights. But I operated under the antiquated (and popular) perspective that men are the enemy of feminism. The truth is, women are holding each other back with their jealousy and insecurity.

You’re not happy with yourself, that much is clear. Instead of using that unhappiness as motivation (like I did) you choose to drag others down with you. You think that if you just “keep trying your best” for as long as possible, eventually things will go your way.

Guess what? The only way to get to the top is by working for it. And I have NEVER seen you work for ANYTHING in the entire time I have known you. It’s not sunshine and rainbows and butterflies like you try to pretend, you fucking robot.

I got where I am because I allowed myself to fail, over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. I felt my bones completely rearrange under my skin. I’ve taken on more degrading commentary than I could ever dish back out. I cried so hard it hurt because I put every last ounce of myself into this game.

You haven’t done that. You have sat back and let people think for you. I know this for a fact because when I played WITH and AGAINST you, you have no gameplan. You’re sitting there at the helm with someone else tugging at the Madden controllers. You might as well just be a puppet. It’s not even fun playing against you, because no matter how much talent you pad yourself with… You’ll still lose.

Here’s why: You’re not an athlete.

You can’t fake it. You’re either an athlete or you’re not. I know I’m an athlete because I looked more like a boy than a girl for the first 10+ years of my life with excess testosterone coursing through my veins. I had a six pack when I was 12 even though I regularly ate entire Sam’s Club boxes of King Size Reese’s.

I’ve been screamed at by more coaches in my lifetime than you will ever know. I’ve felt the pressure of my personal milliseconds determining the outcome of an entire 100+ person team’s victory. I’ve also experienced the defeat of my idiotic mistake costing my team everything. I have carried that emotional weight since before you even got your first “big break.” (Which is a whole other thing I could get into, but won’t.)

You are a fraud. A fucking pathetic fraud. Because you have the money and flexibility to do as you please, you think this is a fun side hobby. Guess what? For us it’s a lifestyle. For some of us this is all we live for.

My athleticism is the greatest gift I was ever given. The only people who have ever made me question it? Women. “Friends” who made fun of the way I looked, “teammates” who reveled in my failure, drunk hags who physically assaulted me because they don’t understand the game. “SEMI PROFESSIONALS” who took for granted the only coach who ever cared about them.

Look at yourself. Do you want to grow? Do you want to change? I haven’t seen you do either of those things. You invalidate the hard work I put in for equality.

Why? For a fucking Facebook highlight reel and some cute uniforms? I would tell you to go play in the LFL but you can’t even make that team because you’re not even good enough for them.

Get the fuck out of my world and go play some game that doesn’t require toughness, grit and independence. I hope that you read this and I hope that you quietly exit the stage and let the real athletes shine.

You, and everyone like you, are my inspiration for domination.


(This is what an empowered woman looks like.)